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Training to Be a Man

August 19, 2010 by Becky Beane

We know that to develop into the best we can be—from sports to the arts to business to the military to academics—we must embrace discipline. Except perhaps for prodigies, there is no other way.

But when it comes to our spiritual development, discipline suddenly sounds like a dirty word. It smacks of legalism and constricting rituals, of once again weighting ourselves down with the law after Christ has called us to live freely in grace. It calls to mind the arrogant Pharisee of Luke 18, who bragged to God that he fasted twice a week and tithed regularly. Jesus clearly pointed out that this disciplined religious man went away unjustified before God.

 

Periodically Frontlines features a book recommended by Prison Fellowship staff as a resource for your ministry to prisoners, ex-prisoners, and/or their families. In this issue we highlight Disciplines of a Godly Man, written by R. Kent Hughes.

 

Most people recognize that to become really great at anything, discipline is a must. The star quarterback didn’t just show on the field one day and start off throwing “Hail Marys.” The first chair violinist didn’t play Tchaikovsky’s Opus 35 perfectly the first moment she picked up the violin.

Their star quality came only as the result of hours, weeks, and years of disciplined training and practice—mastering and re-mastering the fundamentals until they seemed almost reflexive.

We know that to develop into the best we can be—from sports to the arts to business to the military to academics—we must embrace discipline. Except perhaps for prodigies, there is no other way.

But when it comes to our spiritual development, discipline suddenly sounds like a dirty word. It smacks of legalism and constricting rituals, of once again weighting ourselves down with the law after Christ has called us to live freely in grace. It calls to mind the arrogant Pharisee of Luke 18, who bragged to God that he fasted twice a week and tithed regularly. Jesus clearly pointed out that this disciplined religious man went away unjustified before God.

And yet, as Kent Hughes points out in his book Disciplines of a Godly Man, “none of us naturally seeks after God, none is inherently righteous, none instinctively does good. Therefore, as children of grace, our spiritual discipline is everything—everything!”

Of course, Hughes has the apostle Paul to back him up. He speaks of the need to train ourselves to be godly (1 Timothy 4:7) and to buffet our bodies in order to win the race (1 Corinthians 9:24-27).

Legalism or Liberty?

The difference between legalism and discipline, Hughes clarifies, is “motivation: legalism is self-centered; discipline is God-centered. The legalistic heart says, ‘I will do this thing to gain merit with God.’ The disciplined heart says, ‘I will do this thing because I love God and want to please Him.’ ”

Rather than constraining us, spiritual disciplines free us to become what Christ has designed us to be—just as a highly disciplined Yo-Yo Ma is free to soar the boundless skies of musical ingenuity upon his cello.

In Disciplines of a Godly Man, Hughes focuses on four important areas of a man’s life. (Hughes writes specifically to men because, well, he is a man, and because he believes that, in general, men are “much less spiritually inclined and spiritually disciplined than women.”)

These four areas are Relationships, Soul, Character, and Ministry. Within each area, he addresses specific disciplines. Under relationships, for example, he covers the disciplines of purity, marriage, fatherhood, and friendship. Under character, he delves into the disciplines of integrity, tongue, work, and perseverance.

In his easy-to-read, nonjudgmental style, Hughes speaks of the ways the world’s temptations and faulty worldviews pull men away from godly living. From the Scriptures, as well as more modern life stories, he draws both positive and negative examples—men weakened by their lack of discipline (e.g., King David’s sexual indulgences) or strengthened by responsible commitments (e.g., David’s and Jonathan’s deep friendship).

For each discipline he provides several practical ways to strengthen it. For example, the overall discipline of purity is strengthened by such practical disciplines as accountability (having someone to ask “the hard questions” that may call for confession and repentance), prayer and memorization of God’s Word, and “hedges” (protective boundaries such as refraining from verbal intimacy with women other than one’s wife).

As a guide for either personal or group study, each chapter includes “food for thought” and application questions. The reader/student must consider: Now what do I do with this in my own life?

Disciplines of a Godly Man is an excellent resource to use with prisoners or ex-prisoners. Prison builds certain disciplines into inmates’ lives—the repetitive routines of chow time, counts, shower schedules, exercise regimens. But these are not the disciplines that count the most in directing prisoners’ interactions with one another, with their families, with prison staff, with the community to which they will eventually return, and with God. For that they need spiritual disciplines that will help them strengthen the “new man” that Christ has created by His grace—and Hughes’ book is a valuable guide.

Filed Under: Prison & Prisoners, Prison Fellowship News & Updates, Uncategorized

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