Alone in his cell one night, Mark Downs wondered if anyone cared whether he lived or died.
The answer eventually came through a dedicated Prison Fellowship Bible study leader, who showed Mark through Scripture that Jesus loved him and would always be with him.
When he was a 12-year-old boy, Mark Downs’s heart stopped beating. Hurled through the windshield of a car racing 110 miles per hour when it crashed, he was pronounced dead at the scene. But at the local hospital, doctors managed to restart his heart and revive him.
That near brush with death could have prompted Mark to reevaluate the meaning of his life, but he missed the opportunity. “I was young and still wanted to live my own will,” he says. Instead he set himself on a 20-year path of alcohol, drugs, theft, juvenile detention, jail, and eventually, a California state prison.
The car crash was only one part of Mark’s difficult childhood. His father, when he bothered to show up, molested him. Mark concealed the abuse from his mother, an alcoholic. Left to himself, Mark and a friend began running away, breaking into homes, and stealing. By 15 Mark began injecting himself with drugs. “My addictions had begun and there was no stopping them. I was on the road to destruction.”
Any hope of a stable life ended with his mother’s death five years later. He also lost his father and older brother to untimely deaths. Mark drifted in and out of jail until finally he received an eight-year prison sentence. Stuck behind bars, Mark released his anger and energy into fights. He was stabbed three times. “Prison was all about survival,” he says.
Kicking Off the Hinges
Alone in his cell one night, Mark wondered if anyone cared whether he lived or died.
The answer eventually came through a dedicated Prison Fellowship Bible study leader, who showed Mark through Scripture that Jesus loved him and would always be with him.
Mark was stunned.
“I knew about God and I thought He had a plan for my life, but I was not able to find it,” he says. “Through all those years, I was looking to God for all the wrong reasons, yet He never gave up on me.”
Sitting in his cell, Mark reviewed his Bible study and his eyes fell on Jesus’ words in Revelation 3:20: “Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and sit with him, and he with Me.”
Says Mark today, “I didn’t just open the door to Jesus, I kicked the hinges off!”
Mark gave his life to Jesus that day and his life turned in a new direction. “I surrendered my life to Jesus and for the first time, I prayed with a pure heart, not knowing what to expect but wanting something different in my life. I could see a purpose in my life now, a little light at the end of a long tunnel.”
Mark was water baptized in 2006 after his release from prison. He cleaned up his life forever, or so he thought. An old associate lured him back into minor drug use, and Mark was jailed for several brief stints in 2007.
“I still had some gray areas in my life that God was working on,” he explains. “God was cleaning out the old and putting in the new. He was building me strong for the future.” Mark resumed his Prison Fellowship Bible study while in jail, where PF volunteers waited to help him overcome his lingering difficulties. This time, the message stuck.
In early 2008 Mark was paroled to an out-patient rehabilitation clinic. By August he had completed the program with such praise that he was hired as a manager-counselor at a sober living program.
Mark became a member of New Hope Church in Clovis, California, and met a “wonderful, Christian woman,” who helps anchor his new life.
Then he began volunteering at the Fresno Prison Fellowship office, working at the PF thrift store, and delivering Angel Tree gifts. Through his Prison Fellowship contacts, he became involved in other Christ-centered ministries.
“I Want to Go Back”
Mark has stayed “clean and sober” for more than three years, a miracle he attributes to his confidence in God’s power and love for him. “I no longer tell God how big my mountain is, I tell the mountain how big my God is!” proclaims Mark. “He knows my heart, He hears my whispers, and He answers my prayers.”
Now 46, Mark is a changed man. Instead of continuing a life of self-destruction, he allowed God to give him a new heart, and now he reaches out to other lonely prisoners with the love and hope of Jesus Christ.
“My church has just kicked off a new ministry for prisoners, and Prison Fellowship is one of our partners,” says Mark. “After what I have been through in my life, I feel led to minister to inmates. I want to go back inside prison and mentor others, as was done for me.”
Prison Fellowship field director Janice Little, who has known Mark for years and attends the same church, says, “Mark is a vital part of Celebrate Recovery and a valuable mentor in our reentry program. He always has a smile on his face and is eager to be of help.”
Mark adds, “I don’t know what tomorrow will bring, but I know what yesterday brought. And if I continue to put my faith and trust in God, then today is going to be just fine!”